Friends, Lovers or nothing…

“Now that we are over as the loving kind,
We’ll be dreaming ways to keep the good alive.
Only what we want is not a compromise,
I’d be pouring tears into your drying eyes.

Friends, lovers or nothing,
There can only be one.
Friends, lovers or nothing,
There’ll never be an in-between, so give it up.”

John Mayer, Friends, Lovers or Nothing from the Album Battle Studies

Sometimes I think that as a church we haven’t recognized that people have broken up with us. We’re that person who still clings to hope, who waits by the phone and longs for a call.  That person who tells themselves it’s ‘just a break’ and things will work out in the end.  Maybe it’s not entirely our fault.  They flirt with us.  They still need us for baptisms and weddings.  The use us for what we can offer and then leave us once again wondering what we did or didn’t do.

This is not a good thing.

I think it’s time to move on.  We’ve got to move forward in life and embrace the future.  Clinging to the past, dwelling on failed relationships never served anyone well.   As John Mayer says, “There’ll never be an in-between, so give it up.”  We cannot change the past but we can change the future. While we may have failed to recognize that people have moved on without us, we can now make the decision to move ahead.  We can decide to be what Jesus wants us to be.  We can be empowered by the Spirit to change and grow.  We can find new ways to engage people where they are at.  We can find ways to be relevant in ways that matter to people now.

The question is will we do this?  Are we willing to take a bold step into the future or would we rather wait by the phone hoping people will call and want to come running back to us?

The time is now.  Action is what is called for.  We need to let go of who we were and find out who we are to become.

We cannot wallow.  We cannot sit in-between waiting for answers that aren’t coming.  We need to go out and find what we are looking for.   We must stop dreaming of ways to keep the good we knew alive and we have to be alive right now! We need to be alive in a way that matters to the people of today. We can move into the future with confidence.  We can break up with our past.  We can move boldly into the future if we have to courage to do it.

Do we have that courage?


2 responses to “Friends, Lovers or nothing…

  1. Thank you!!! It is time this message got out

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